| My heels clicked
sharply on the walk leading to the door of the saloon. I stopped, paused,
and checked my equipment. Pen, notepad, hair in place, lipstick not
smeared?…… bodyguard? A girl pen-slinger can’t be too careful these
days. I took a deep breath, pushed open the swinging doors and glided into
the dimly lit hall. On the left were a crowd of people with name tags. Not
the people I was gunning for. Case-Weatherhead B-schoolers out for a good
time, quick with a financial statement but otherwise too self-absorbed to
cause any trouble. Further into the gloom, I spotted the characteristic
haircuts. Abercrombie clones. Giving my body guard a cautionary signal I
slinked up to the two closest men and drawled, "So who’s the alpha
gorilla round here?" The two looked at each other, and stopped to
think. Then they pointed at each other and grinned, "SHE is".
Ok, that’s poetic excess. Nevertheless, close enough
to the truth that an organization with Guerilla Queer Bar’s mission
shouldn’t take offense. GQB as it is known for short, is one-half
political theatre, one-half social club. Started in San Francisco as a
comic protest against the uniformity and conformity of gay-club culture,
it has spontaneously spread across the country. If you look on the web,
you might find the San Francisco version a bit over the top for our
mid-Western sensibilities. (There is a reason that the Sister’s of
Perpetual Indulgence don’t have a branch in Cleveland. ) |
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A Note for Readers:
Alpha Omega does not in general cover events or locations
at which spouses would not be comfortable. Hence, some of the regular
watering holes, though known to everyone, are not listed in our resource
section on the Web. While GQB is distinctly a function of the GLBT
community, we saw nothing about the activity that would be offensive or
suggestive. Nothing a bold spouse or SO shouldn’t enjoy, if any kind of
bar hopping is or was part of your life. GQB however is an advanced
activity. If you’re worried about passing, or being recognized don’t go.
If you aren’t at ease with all kinds of people in the GLBT community don’t
go. And if you don’t know how to make your own party, walk up to strangers
and say "hi", if your idea of a good time is watching life go by
around you, silently nursing a drink don’t go. This probably isn’t a
good venue for you shutterbugs and trophy hunters either. But if you like to
meet people, make friends, do a little outreach on a one-to-one basis, share
a few laughs, then this could be a nice once a month alternative.-dsf
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The program is simple. From 6 to 9 P.M., on the first
Friday of each month, a bunch of people on an e-mail list gather at a bar,
club, or restaurant they only heard about the week before. It could be any
venue in the city having the right size, energy, and location as determined
by the loose collective of people who deny running the show. Brian and
Brooke, who do seem to be the alpha gorillas, started the Cleveland branch
after reading an article about GQB in the Advocate. The Tree House in
Tremont, BW3 in Coventry and Jillian’s in the Cedar/Fairhill district have
all been venues. Where next, who knows? Anywhere that isn’t on the top of
the list of gay clubs is open to a GQB invasion.
Anyhow, my bodyguard soon found people who’d lived in
Texas the same time he did, and vanished on a nostalgia trip. I ended up
chatting with a tall, impossibly beautiful lesbian woman, who poured out her
life story to my eager ears. She’d come up from Akron, with a male buddy
who thought she’d like the GQB venue as a way to expand her social life.
As she came back from collecting her coat from the other side of the bar,
she leaned over and whispered that she loved overhearing conversations. As
she’d walked by, she heard someone say, "Boy, now that one I could
swear was a real woman." That made my evening. What would make yours?
Guerilla Queer Bar is a story waiting for you to write your own chapter.
Grab a pen and a party attitude. You can sign up for the e-list that posts
the venue for the next event at:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/guerrillaqueerbarcleveland
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